It was a long night

It seems like as soon as the lights go out, my mind breaks down. I shut my eyes and see those tiny legs and feet. It is just heartbreaking. I cried myself to sleep again last night. Jasper has taken the children with him today so that I can relax a bit.

I passed more material today. It was what looked like placenta. I hope and pray I do not have to have a D&C. I will monitor myself at home and if things do not decline I will have to go to Dr. I plan to buy several pregnancy tests and take until they read negative. When that happens I will know I am alright.

What a nightmare this has been.