Very soon we will bring home our newest member of the family. I am so excited!
Thursday, December 29, 2016
Tuesday, December 13, 2016
It Is Ironic
Last night I update about my dad, tonight I'm losing him to Alzheimer's. Not sure how long he has left though. ..
Monday, December 12, 2016
35 Years Without
When I was 12, my parents divorced. My life was shattered and little did I know, it would be 35 years before I would see my father again. He left me and my brothers behind when he left Mom and started his new life. I remember being so angry at him. I hated him, I hated what I learned about him, yet I loved him. Though it would be years before I could admit it. When I married and had my first child, I tried to contact him. Only to face rejection yet again. Every time I would contact, he would reject. I finally decided I would simply keep him updated with phone numbers addresses and births. If he refused me, it would be on him, not me.
In May 2014, My mother passed away. I immediately needed my dad. I cannot help it, but, it is just how it hit me. I called my step mother and spoke with her. She informed me that my dad had severe alzheimer's. I simply asked he if I could come when she felt it best. I needed closure as I had with Mama's death. I was with her when she died.
A couple of months ago she called me and told me to come. I was so shocked. I was so overwhelmed and so terrified. I went the following Monday. I took my oldest son JJ with me. He helped me stay calm and read directions. He lives 133 miles away.
When I got there, I admit I was disappointed that he didn't recognize who I was. But it didn't matter, because for the first time in 35 years I was sitting within feet of my DAD!! I have been twice and will go as often as I can. I know his days are numbered.
Though some do not understand my need, I am so thankful for what time I have with my dad. Though I understand others feeling toward him, I have my own feelings and will not allow anyone to rob me of my time with him.
I do not know how long I have with him, but you better believe, I am one happy girl, as I again have my DAD!!
In May 2014, My mother passed away. I immediately needed my dad. I cannot help it, but, it is just how it hit me. I called my step mother and spoke with her. She informed me that my dad had severe alzheimer's. I simply asked he if I could come when she felt it best. I needed closure as I had with Mama's death. I was with her when she died.
A couple of months ago she called me and told me to come. I was so shocked. I was so overwhelmed and so terrified. I went the following Monday. I took my oldest son JJ with me. He helped me stay calm and read directions. He lives 133 miles away.
When I got there, I admit I was disappointed that he didn't recognize who I was. But it didn't matter, because for the first time in 35 years I was sitting within feet of my DAD!! I have been twice and will go as often as I can. I know his days are numbered.
Though some do not understand my need, I am so thankful for what time I have with my dad. Though I understand others feeling toward him, I have my own feelings and will not allow anyone to rob me of my time with him.
I do not know how long I have with him, but you better believe, I am one happy girl, as I again have my DAD!!
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